What Would the Setbacks Do?
Email questions to advice[at]thesetbacks.com
NOT MY KID
December 10th, 2002
Mike "Dusty" DeAquavilla writes:
Hey setbacks. I met a chick about a year ago, and we ended up having sex the same night that we met. I lost touch with her immediately, and thought nothing of it...no big deal, so I thought. Yeah, right...
She shows up at Home Depot, where I work, with a kid in her arms, claiming it's mine, and she says that her parents are freaking about us getting married.
I almost started crying, as this child looks nothing like me. I'm latino, with black hair. This kid doesn't even have any hair.
Also, I'm pretty sure that we used something to prevent something like this happening. I WAS drunk I'll admit, but she said that she'd take care of it...
I remember asking her specifically if she'd take care of it....man I hope she thought I was referring to using a condom....my buddy thinks she was kid crazy...what do I do now? I just got promoted at work to rental assistant manager, and busted my ass to get back into the store. I was working the Propane tank for the whole winter...I can't have this happening to me right now...
 Trevor |
Dusty,
Congratulations! There are few joys in this world that compare to fathering your very own child. For advice I am going to recommend the following books that may be able to help you raise a happy, healty child: 1. Raising Kids Who Care: About Themselves, About Their World, About Each Other; by Kathleen O'Connell Chesto; Sheed and Ward; ISBN: 1556129211; (January 1997) 2. Caring for Your Baby and Young Child: Birth to Age 5; by The American Academy of Pediatrics, Stephen P. Shelov (Editor), Steven P. Shelov (Editor), Robert E. Hannemann (Editor); (July 1999) 3. Rich Larson's Haunted House of Lingerie Volume 3; by Rich Larson;SQP Inc.; ISBN: 0865620482; (December 1, 2001) The last book is just for your entertainment, I'm sure you could use a good book, and this erotic thriller is just what the doctor ordered. |
|---|---|
 Steve |
Thanks for writing Mike - It's nice to know our music appeals to parents too.
Cheers Steve |
 Paul |
This is definately a situation that you want to handle delicately. I suggest that you take this problem to Jerry Springer. He always seems to be able to sort these sorts of problems out in a nice civilized manner.
Final Thought: Nobody wins when parents put their petty squabbles above the welfare of a child. Let's hope you put your differences aside, and do what's best for your child. |
 Chris |
Mike,
Dude, you need to get a DNA test, but to be quite honest with you, I can almost guarantee that this is your kid. Unless you asked her specifically if she would take care of getting a dome, and unless you remember her doing that exactly, then she probably is kid crazy. You're going to have to make some serious choices. My advice is this. Rent all of season three of Degrassi Junior High, and learn from Spike & Shane. This situation sucks so bad, that I am so glad it isn't me. You're so screwed man! This chick is a bona-fide wackass. She doesn't talk to you for a year, and then shows up at your work with a kid? DUDE! This is like a R&B video for crissakes! THIS SO SUCKS, that I'M CRYING FOR YOU LIKE ARGENTINA! c.diddy P.S. Tears are falling from my face as we speak. You are so fucked! |