What Would the Setbacks Do?
Email questions to advice[at]thesetbacks.com
Hot Damn! Birthday Surprises!
May 15th, 2003
Pepper writes:
I know this band. Let's call them The Backsets. They have a show coming up
at . . . . The Lonbaby this saturday night and it just happens to be their drummer's birthday. Now, I thought it would be some crazy and hilarious fun to throw copper cans and copies of UNDERSTOREY cd's at him. And then maybe some good natured heckling by insulting my mother, and dumping vomit on my head while in mid-song.
Then to finish it all off, I was going to jump onstage mid song, sit beside him, and begin playing bongos. I thought this would be a great birthday surprise, get a good rise out of his bandmates. But would it be better to get up on stage and sing a couple tunes to him.
Is this a good idea or a bad idea? I think it would be hilarious good fun. Almost as much fun as a Steven Segal movie, but not quite a violent. Or as corny. But still fun.
Thanks for your advice.
 Trevor |
I'm afraid that this advice column is tearing this band apart! Chris and Steve have used the last few to just rip into each other. And since someone called Paul out by daring him to put a positive spin onto a horrible situation, he hasn't really answered any.
I feel adrift, alone in a sea of insanity. A world where people no longer help one another through advice columns. A world where people are afraid to help their fellow man for fear of retribution from others. When will the craziness end?! As for your question, Pepper, I'd almost say anything goes at Chris' birthday show. Actually I'd stop short of dumping a bucket of vomit on his head, I just don't like the sound of that. Speaking of Chris' Birthday, its time to blow the lid off of the lies. Chris will be turning 26!!!! Not 21 as has been quoted in several places, inluding Thursday's Ottawa Citizen. |
|---|---|
 Steve |
Awaiting wisdom... |
 Paul |
Awaiting wisdom... |
 Chris |
Congratulations go out to Steve Palmer for writing this advice without the help of his Hooked On Learning educational VHS tapes. Good Job Steve! Gettin' better!
In all seriousness, this weekend should be good. Steve will have his electronic anklet one while we play, and he may be able to stay until 9:30 if his parole officer allows, and as long as there are no children or midgets within fifty feet of him while performing or drinking, we can all forget about last year's birthday celebration at McDonald's, when Mr. Palmer decided to hide in the napkin and straw wicket, stick his johnson out of the napkin dispenser, and attempt to convince people to grab one. Steve...we're going to do everything we can to ensure that you ring in my 21st birthday with ZEST. I'm stoked for your gift, as last year's Everybody Loves Raymond shirt that you got me was something that I truly cherished. |