What Would the Setbacks Do?
Email questions to advice[at]thesetbacks.com
SEX ISSUES-need serious help.
March 31st, 2003
Greg writes:
My girlfriend and I share a very intimate and adventurous relationship. She's a dental assistant, and I work at Mikasa. I sold her some plates about a year ago, and we've been together ever since. We're what some people like to call "SWINGERS", as we often swap partners, have special parties, and take part in a website ring that focuses on people that live our lifestyle. My girlfriend has since started a website of her own, and has given up her job, as she is making loads of money. She has not once asked me to take part in the website's activities on camera, and since that, I've been really dealing with some hardcore jealousy issues surrounding our relationship. I find myself insanely furious when I come home and there are three other men with my girl, whereas before, I would have encouraged activity like that. Why has she not asked me to get involved in her website romps...I don't know. What I do know is that I am offended and suspicious of her not asking me....either way...this is making it very difficult to be together. She says that I'm acting like a 5 year old, and that I knew what I was getting into when I did...
What do I do? I love her, but this is ripping me apart.
 Trevor |
Dude, there's two possibilities here. One is good - she is trying to keep business and pleasure separate. If she's making money on the website, she may not want to cheapen your relationship by having you involved. This situation may also lead to her no longer wanting to 'swing' with you as that's her job. Nothing takes the fun out of something like money. In this case you're screwed and may no longer be able to have sexual relations with you wife.
The other possibility is that you no longer offer her the goods. She's found better and you are tossed out to the curb like so much recycled newspapers. In this case you're screwed and may no longer be able to have sexual relations with your wife. Bottom line: you're screwed (even though you haven't been in a while...) |
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 Steve |
Awaiting wisdom... |
 Paul |
I'm glad that you have brought up this question. This issue plagues many couples. I think the core problem here is the fact that work and home should be separate.
The home should be a place where you and your wife can relax after a long days work. As soon as the work life comes home it becomes hard to enjoy your "down time". My advice is for you to get an office for your wife. This will keep the work and home life apart and allow you to enjoy your wife without jealousy. Good luck. |
 Chris |
Maybe if you took into consideration how difficult it can be to penetrate...er I mean...operate a sex website, then maybe you'll understand how she probably doesn't want to complicate your relationship with your full out activity in the scene. That takes a lot out of a relationship. Also...you said that you came home to her having a four way sexfest with three guys. STOP! THINK!
Have you ever had sex with three guys at once? I'm assuming that this is difficult. Instead of being jealous, be thankful that your woman is bringing home the bacon! This is a tremendous amount of pressure...stop being such a whiner, and start appreciating your nympho for the unique breadwinner that she is.... |