What Would the Setbacks Do?

Email questions to advice[at]thesetbacks.com

R.KELLY

March 12th, 2003

Maude Slipowicz writes:

Hey Dears,

I really like R.KELLY, but my fiancee thinks that playing his song, "Heaven I Need A Hug" is too innappropriate for our upcoming wedding. In case you didn't know, R.KELLY has been accused of having sex with minors. My husband is adamant about this, but this song has a deep significant meaning to me, and I would be crushed to find out that we weren't able to share that with our family on our special day. What do I do?

-M.Slipowicz

	Hi guys, the original R.Kelly here. I'm really disappointed to see this young R.Kelly dragging my good name through the mud and preventing my song "Heaven I Need a Hug" from being a part of this special day for you. When I wrote the song after winning my second cup with the Toronto Maple Leafs, I hoped that the happiness I found in writing it could be shared with people like you, Maude. It's a shame that it can't be that way. Thanks for your letter and take care.
Trevor	R. Kelly's well documented legal problems give me the creeps. I can no longer listen to him sing without needing to take a shower. As much significance the song may have to you, I can't listen without picturing him singing to a 15 year old girl. I don't know if you've noticed, but a lot of his songs contain sexual innuendo. He doesn't really only want to put his "keys" in your "ignition", there's another meaning there... My advice: pick a song that may be more significant to both you and your partner, as this is his day as well as yours. For example, there are many power ballads that serve this purpose beautifully. Every Rose Has Its Thorn still makes me cry. Also, if sexual innuendo is what your after on your wedding day, try early Red Hot Chilli Peppers' "Sir Psycho Sexy" or ZZTop's "Pearl Necklace".
Steve	Awaiting wisdom...
Paul	Well I would hate to give another "syrupy" answer but....... This is a tough one. I think I could maybe let things slide if R. Kelly got caught for possetion or disturbing the peace but child porn is pretty bad. This song had better mean A LOT to you. I shouldn't really be telling you this because I wanted to keep a secret for my wedding but I'll let you in on it. It will be the greatest day in my life so I don't see how I couldn't play "Paradise City" by Guns and Roses. I have it all planned out; as soon as I start to walk down the aisle everyone in the church will start to clap the intro......... It will be the greatest monster ballad ever.
Chris	Maude Slipowicz! Get into a car, douse the vehicle head to foot in kerosene, and light a zippo as you drive off a cliff at Thelma & Louise type speeds.

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