What Would the Setbacks Do?
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One Hitch to Rule Them All
March 8th, 2005
Dildo Baggins writes:
My friend is a huge Lord of the Rings fan. When we went to the opening of Return of the King, he dressed up as Treebeard. It was an elaborate costume of faux bark and foliage. He even had one of the special effects specialists who worked on the films fly up from New Zealand to supervise the construction of his costume and ensure it matched Tolkien's descriptions in the books.
Since the release of that film he's been very depressed that the trilogy has come to an end. To help him through this difficult time he's started writing a fourth installment in the series. At first I thought it was sort of a neat idea, but last week he sent me his rough draft and I have to tell you guys that I'm really worried about him. Following the grand battle at Minus Tirith in Return of the King, my friend's story picks up back at Mordor where it is discovered that the spirit of Sauron continues to live in the form of a diecast steel trailer, known only as "Trailor, lord of the recreational vehicles". Since the ring was destroyed in the last movie, the story centres around "the one trailer hitch" which apparently "has in it the power to cover middle earth in a blanket of incredible evilness".
Beyond the fact that this story is ridiculous, I'm worried that my friend is losing touch with reality. He's already commissioned several treatments of his draft into a real script by reputable Hollywood writers and his wife and him are going broke trying to get this project off the ground. How can I tell him I'm concerned without offending him?
 Trevor |
Listen BAGGINS, for art to truly flourish, there must first be suffering. And not just physical suffering like nails in the eye or mosquito bites, but also spiritual suffering. It sounds as though your friend is about to go through some unsettling times. Rejection from major studios, harsh criticisms from unsympathetic editors, and heartless rewrites from scores of screenplay writers.
In times like that, he'll be grateful to have a friend like you, who stood by him and encouraged him in his art. Especially when later this month he and his wife are sleeping on your couch and eating leftover cat food if the idea doesn't sell. And if the idea does sell, you can remind him how you helped him through the tough times, and when he and Peter Jackson (the director, not the cigarette brand) are accepting an Oscar, your name will be mentioned. Awesome. |
|---|---|
 Steve |
Awaiting wisdom... |
 Paul |
Your friend better hurry up with his follow up movie because I read on IMDB the other day that the original, made in Japan in 1982, is going to be re-released with english subtitles. This first interpretation of J.R.R. Tolkens' novels was only done in one installment and called "Si Won Gi-Cuda" which loosely translates to "The Master Circle Quest". From the reviews that I have read, the fight scenes are supposed to be beautifully choreographed and the script quite well written. It also makes a note that Chow Yun Fat has a small part as a young hobbit. I wish your friend the best of luck but this sounds much cooler then some RV hitch story. |
 Chris |
Trevor,
I don't know either man. You're not the only one concerned with Steve's weird behaviour lately. Ever since he bought the LOTR trilogy, the dude has become a bonafide strange character. Did you know that he had that costume built for everyday use? He has lost his mind. As long as he shows up for practice, I'm fine with it, and really couldn't care what he's writing or doing otherwise. I'm just keeping my mouth shut until he doesn't show up for something band related. |