What Would the Setbacks Do?
Email questions to advice[at]thesetbacks.com
New Years Absolution
January 5th, 2005
Burt T. writes:
Hey there guys. First of all I would like to say that I'm a first time writer, long time reader. Love the advice.
My story starts with New Years Eve. I was at Zaphods to see you guys play and I met this really cool girl. I was instantly attracted to her raven black hair and curvaceous body. We talked for a while about all sorts of things; jobs, Christmas, family, shampoo, the afterlife and the love of music. Time flew by and next thing I knew it was midnight. We shared the New Years countdown and embraced during the celebration. Watching the TV at the club after new years, we saw Motley Crue playing. It was then that she broke the news to me. "Hey, that's my Dad on TV. Mick Mars is my Dad". Turns out that she is the love child of Mick Mars during the 1982 Motley Crue tour. At this exact moment my heart broke. Really, I'm more of a Poison fan. Could I be with a person who is connected to such an obvious Poison rip-off band?
 Trevor |
Listen BURT, you need to get in touch with someone. That someone is yourself.
Try this exercise: find a room with no windows, remove all furniture and wall hangings. Place a single chair in the middle, turn off the lights and sit in the darkness and silence. Ask yourself the following questions, focusing on the words as you say them (out loud). "Who am I?". Repeat this phrase a few times (out loud). Say it louder everytime. This last step is very important. Get up from your chair in the dark. Spin around as fast as you can a dozen times. Then try to find the lightswitch! It's an incredible time. I recommend wearing a helmet if you try this. After doing this, I think you'll have the answer to your question. If you're too lazy to try this, then I'll give you the answer: get with this chick! If she sires your children, you will have rock royalty in your lineage. This kid will have all the priveliges that other kids don't because Mick Mars is his grandpa. |
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 Steve |
As the father of two illegitimate children, I think I know what I'm talking about when I say that this smells fishy. There's no such thing as a Poison fan in 2005. Any real Poison fans jumped ship in 1992 when C.C. quit the band. I mean, how could Poison exist without his delicous licks and tasty hooks? When he came back in '97 it was obviously just for commercial reasons... it was no longer about the raw glam punk attitude that had fueled the band in their early days. You need to forget about Poison. Really man. |
 Paul |
Awaiting wisdom... |
 Chris |
NO WAY. Poison is an amazing band. Their legacy is NOT meant to be tainted by the likes of such poseurs as Motely Crue, and that includes lame ass fans, and illegitimate daughters of band members. First of all, you have no proof that she is in fact Mick Mars' daughter, and secondly...dude....if she looks anything like Mick Mars, you should have your eyes checked, because he is a walking corpse.
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