Steve's Open Letter to Chris Saracino

June 8th, 2004

The Saracino Residence
Ottawa, Ontario

Dear Chris,

You've been a good friend to me for many years and I feel that since you joined the Setbacks full-time, our friendship has grown even stronger. It's been great getting to know you better over the last while and I treasure your friendship a lot.

I'd be lying though if I said being your friend hasn't been a bumpy road at times. I'm referring specifically to your rather unusual habit of visiting my home for short periods of time but always finding an opportunity to drop off several giant logs reeking so badly it causes me to seal the bathroom shut and retch uncontrollably for hours after you leave.

Maybe it's my nice collection of music magazines that you like to browse and borrow from before you visit the bathroom, or maybe it's that your trying to tell me you hate me in a not-so-subtle way. In any case, it's terribly inconsiderate and you're testing not only my patience, but the cleaning ability of my toilet brush and the bonds of our friendship.

I hope you'll take this letter to heart and make a positive change for the better. I consider you a dear friend, but if you're not able to shake this nasty habit, I may be forced to reluctantly call a "friends off" on you.

Respectfully yours,
Steven M. Palmer