The Big Money Shot Show
by Trevor Kealey

August 4th, 2006

So I thought I’d do a quick wrap up of our attempt at winning $300,000 last Friday in the Live 885 Big Money Shot. I will preface it by saying we did not win, as I don’t want to give any false hope to our faithful fans and readers.

The evening started as one would expect, with Chris weaseling out of hauling gear. But this time, I was getting a ride from him, so I got to ride on his coattails and also not haul gear. Now I see why he does this every time. Anyway, Steve and Chet get to the club on time, and are the only band there (or half band). By the time Chris and I get there, more bands have shown up and people are setting up gear. We will be doing no sound check, as there are 5 bands, so we head out in search of some grub and beers.

After Chris finally finishes his plate of mustard and ketchup, we head back to the club to watch the other bands and to get our drink on. The first 100 people through the door were offered Big Money Shot t-shirts. As we walked in, they were offered our way, but Chet dismissed him totally, waving his hand saying “save them for the fans”. This left the guy handing out the shirts very confused. The rest of us shuffled by, shrugging at the guy to tell him that we’re not really that cocky.

Quarter Life hit the stage first. I was hoping I’d see my cousin Tyler in this band. But apparently he was busy and so was replaced by some other keyboardist. They played pop rock well. Like the Counting Crows or something.

We taped an interview to be played on Live 885 during our set. We joked our way through all the serious questions, leaving no doubt as to our drive and determination to succeed as musicians.

After that it was our turn to hit the stage. Our plan was to destroy the place. No energy was to be taken off stage, the plan was to give it our all. We yelled motivational slogans into each other’s faces from close range, then ran onstage. We started with some new songs, and the crowd was digging it. People moved closer to the stage, which is always a good sign.

The set was heavy on the kicks and jumps, and the crowd was eating it up. I think our high energy set was just what the Thirsty Scholar needed that night. During the last song, we even made our second attempt at the Rock and Roll Totem Pole. We tried this on one other occasion (there is a video of it on our newspage). This time the stage was taller, so when Steve jumped down into the crowd, I just had to slide onto his shoulders. Easy as that. Unfortunately, while mounting him, I kicked the pick right out of his hand. It was a precise kick, touching no fingers, just pick. He played the rest of the song with his fingers.

Just as I was about to start singing the last verse from atop Mt. Palmer, we got sprayed with beer. This encouraged other people to do the same and we were immediately soaked. One lucky sprayer aimed his spray with laser accuracy directly into my eye. But I kept singing, and Steve kept playing. Eventually, Steve got bumped by the swelling crowd, backed into the stage hitting the back of his knees, and we tumbled hard onto our backs. Amazingly the song kept going, and Steve did not miss a single note on the searing solo he was tearing into. Faces were melting all over the crowd.

We then wrapped it up and attempted to unravel the mess of patch cords and microphones we had created. We got some serious cheering and made a lot of new fans/friends after the show. It was safe to say that we had no gas left in the tank, the motivational slogans had worked.

We spent the rest of the night watching the other bands, thinking maybe we’d destroyed the place enough to win this contest, even though the radio station sponsoring it doesn’t even play the bands we try to emulate. After Tympanic played their mellow songs, The Second Glance picked up the pace again with their awesome, super tight set. Then Eppiphane came on, finished the night, and was declared the winner.

In all, a hell of a fun night despite the fact that there were no beer tickets.